Proud User of Snail Mail since 1974

I just mailed in my tax stuff to the IRS and the State of Pennsylvania. I’m getting a nice chunk of change back so I can’t wait for the cash to hit my bank account. Yes, I still mail in my taxes. It’s not that I don’t WANT to file electronically, I do, I really do, but my accountant of a billion years doesn’t do it. GOD KNOWS WHY NOT. And yes, it sucks, but I trust him implicitly and I’m way too scared to do my own taxes and file them online myself.

I will attempt doing electrical work in the house, I will play around with power tools but I do not want to attempt anything with the IRS. Amazing since I work in Finance, but true nonetheless. I do not trust that I won’t fuck up something so totally that they will repossess my house and take my $7.00 in savings and haul me off to prison. And we all know I wouldn’t wind up in Martha Stewart prison, I’d wind up in some scary prison being somebody’s bitch and I’d never see my dogs or drive my new car ever again.

So, I’m back in the dark ages mailing in my tax forms and waiting for the money to be directly deposited in my account. Of course now it will be like a little present. One day I’ll check my account and instead of seeing $1.34 I’ll see the new flagstone patio I want to put in, or the new shed for the yard, or the new sideboard for the dining room. I almost think it’s better this way.

Yeah, you’re right, who am I kidding. It’s me and I’m all about instant gratification. This is KILLING ME.