Friday, June 02, 2006

How to make all your boyfriend's dreams come true

Invite him to have drinks and dinner tonight with you and two, very hot, single lesbians (one of whom he has a HUGE crush on).

Sharing the love and the panty lines

Melissa over at Sugared Harpy does an awesome weekly post on her Blog called “Monday Google Smackdown” in which she writes about the key terms people search for on Google and yahoo to get to her blog. (Most Bloggers have stat counters on our blogs that tell us who, if you have your cookies enabled on your computer, has been visiting our site, how many times, and a location. In addition to these cool features we can also see what key words they typed into Google to find us.) Today I got a good one worthy enough to post about:

“Panty lines showing through pants pictures”

Really? You want to see pictures of that? On the internet? WHY? I try to avoid seeing this. Are you worried that you might see yourself online? Like as a Glamour “Don’t”? Do you want to see what others deem a fashion faux pas? Can’t you just go outside, look at some asses and judge for yourself? I see them EVERYWHERE.

Of course who am I to judge. Maybe you’re just lazy and don’t want to bother walking outside. Or maybe you don’t work in an office where people dress inappropriately or badly. Or maybe, just maybe, you’re going to do some sick and perverted things while looking at those pictures. If that’s the case, sorry my blog didn’t have what you were looking for but thanks for stopping by and have a nice day.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Tomorrow night

On the first Friday of every month all the art galleries in the Old City section of Philadelphia stay open until 8:00 pm to showcase their new works. Tomorrow night my neighbor will be exhibiting in his studio the photographs he took while in Rwanda shooting a photo documentary. If you happen to be in Philly tomorrow night please stop in...

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Urban Kingdom. Just like Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom but without the insurance or the Wild.

This morning I interfered with nature.

I know you’re not supposed to do that but I did. I couldn’t help it. I’m sure the whole world will now shift and the earth will spin off its axis but I couldn’t help it. This morning after walking around the park with the mutts instead of going for our usual half hour walk because I was feeling LAZY, we saw a Mama duck and her 11 ducklings. Eleven little balls of fluffy feathers swimming and eating the gross green scum on the top of the pond. NO, I didn’t interfere with them even though I really wanted one to leave its Mother, swim over to me and jump on the bank so I could pet it. No, I didn’t butt in there.

I also didn’t butt in when I saw a baby Robin on the ground hopping pathetically in the grass. The poor thing was way too young to be on its own and couldn’t fly away. What kind of a crap-ass mother does it have to kick it out when it was OBVIOUS it wasn’t ready?! No, I let that one go too. I did however yell at Lucy the Lab to stay away and not to interfere by licking it.

Then, as we were rounding the last bend Lucy ran over to a rock at the top of the stream bank and started nosing it. Then it moved. It was a turtle. A pretty big box turtle, maybe three inches wide and a good 6 inches long. It was stuck on the steepest part of the bank and as we were watching it, it flipped over and rolled back down. I watched it roll and felt so bad for it as it wriggled and struggled to get back onto its four legs. I couldn’t stand it any longer. So yes, I interfered. I went and picked him up and put him at the top of the bank and wished him luck.

Now all I can think about is if that damned thing really was heading up and not trying to actually make it down the bank. Oh well, the damage is done now.